Day 59: Giving Up

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in thoughts wherein I experience myself as being powerless: ‘I will fail’/ ‘not do well at this’- and within participation in such thoughts- give up, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that ‘giving up’ doesn’t actually exist, as I have many times fallen in what I set out to do- but have always brought myself back here and started over and realigned myself with new insights/understandings- that I will always get back up, what differs from situation to situation is the accumulation of breath’s between falling and starting over wherein I see, realize and understand that participating in giving up through participating in thoughts where I experience myself powerless, is pointless, as I will always, inevitably start over- and that buying into the belief that giving up actually exist through participation in thought is actually a way I have designed myself to postpone taking action/facing/sorting out the direction I require to do to become a self-responsible person in this world

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to find comfort in failing at what I set out to do, through projecting myself as failing within my mind as a current reality thought and future projections, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that I have created failure within myself through participating in desire which is not aligned within the principle of oneness and equality

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to postpone investigating, mapping out and making a decision in where to effectively place myself within the system, as allowing myself to postpone making decisions is apparently easier than taking action- which is not so, as I realize, see and understand that that which I perceive to be ‘hard’ is actually only my resistances to living what I have never done before- which is why it seems hard- but never consider that I had, over time programmed myself to live how I am living today- and that to program a new way of living will require an equal amount of action and the accumulation of action- to how I have designed myself in the past, and thus I commit myself to investigate all options, cross-reference where I will be most effective, make a decision and align myself in actions, accordingly

I commit myself to stop all thoughts that pop up into my mind in relation to my current effectiveness and comparing how I see myself through the eyes of the mind to future possibilities/scenarios and in that- feel a sense of comfort in knowing the future as intending, through implication, that I will fail and instead I investigate different options as where to place myself within the system, see what I will be effective in, check the back-chat I will face in such a placement, make a decision and follow through with the necessary actions to align myself within that placement

I commit myself to investigate the desires within myself which I have accepted and allowed to participate within to stop the polarity play-out of desire/expectation where I end up choosing to experience myself ‘feeling safe’ in ‘failure’- and stop, self forgive myself and apply self correction

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