Ive had almost all night to write a blog but I procrastinated and now I’m at the point where I feel exhausted and want to go to sleep. I want to make this blog because I had been considering not to and waiting for tomorrow which I would then write two posts to make up for it but I know that I would be waiting all day to come back to this point to try to redeem myself and basically exist in the mind within future projections- ruining my day. Lol its funny because I am already doing that right now. ok.

I spend more time concerning myself with making a blog and sticking to my word than what actually support me. It seems I have lost that self forgiveness/self directive in seeing and not allowing bullshit but instead more concrned with making a blog instead of sorting myself out. shit.

I am avoiding taking responsiblity for me in what I see is unnacceptable which is allowing backchat in regards to my relationship because I obviously see that this is what is coming up. Though I first wanted to write and take responsibility for me in not allowing abuse which is what I fear doing speaking about this subject, essentially fear of making a mistake that justify not taking responsibility.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react within myself when I read/watch something that reflect the true nature of myself

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to take responsibility for me in the moment I saw the true nature of myself as what I have participated within as abuse and backchat and instead participate in reactions towards myself in an attempt to hide/suppress Who I am

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel guilty that I have not taken responsibility for me in applying and changing myself to no longer allow sexual obsession to direct and influence me

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to continuously participate within thoughts of ‘fear of loss’ and actually giving into and believing these thoughts instead of stopping and writing down the backchat

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear losing the fear of loss

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect a reaction that come up within me to/towards someone/something outside separate from me instead of realizing that this reaction that come up within me is me reacting to myself in what I see/know is true about me and stop, breathe and write down the reaction exactly within that moment to reflect upon

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react to my own reactions

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate within reactions as separation and blame

i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to bring my past reactions of me towards me here as the fear of making a mistake instead of simply stopping

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear taking responsibility for me as the fear of seeing/exposing myself to me

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge myself

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to involve others within my writing from the starting point of separation and abuse and Instead I make sure that my starting point in speaking is of what is best for all and will not cause any unnecessary harm

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to focus on things that do not matter within the context of this world as participating in backchat, emotions feelings etc.

Correction

I do not accept or allow myself to participate in any reaction that come up within me towards something outside separate from me because I do not accept or allow separation or blame and Instead I immediately stop and realise I am reacting to myself in what I know is true about me- take note- and take responsibility for me in that moment

When I know that I will be writing I do not accept or allow myself to procrastinate as distracting myself on the computer postponing the inevitable

I allow myself to write myself out fully and completely before I go into self forgiveness to be more effective in directing myself

I allow myself to write daily on any reactions/feelings/emotions/thoughts/pictures and writing self to freedom as free flow

I do not accept or allow myself to participate in backchat as the fear of loss- Instead I take note and write beside the thought what it is (fear)(desire)etc.

I do not accept or allow myself to fear making a mistake, I do not accept or allow myself to waste time reacting, I stop I breathe, I do what is necessary of me in that moment

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s